TENDING TO THE FIRST ARROW

I love this quote by Pema Chödrön, about tending to the first arrow. The parable of the second arrow is a Buddhist parable about dealing with suffering more skillfully. The Buddhists say that any time we suffer misfortune, two arrows fly our way.

The first arrow that hits us (an unexpected event, situation, illness etc) causes pain and hardship, which we can’t ignore.
The second arrow is the suffering we add on top of the pain. It is our reaction to it, and is optional.

The teaching is that pain and hardship are unavoidable for us all, however, we have a choice when it comes to the suffering. Our relationship to pain and hardship are what to a great extent influences our suffering.

When we tend directly to the experience, and turn off the mental chatter, suddenly the experience of suffering that seems to arise from pain will resolve. This has been shown in research using brain MRI scans in mental and physical pain studies.